Bald Eagle

This morning Quint woke up talking about the little train.

I knew he meant the little "kid" train in our local park which runs in the summer.

We looked at it on the internet but I explained it is not open yet.

I guess because we don't currently have any snow,

he thought it should be open.

On our way home this morning he asked to drive by it.

It is a small detour so I agreed.

We drove into the park,

it was slightly flooded from snow melt,

deserted

and all the rides were closed up.

I showed Quint and Russell.

Hard to believe in a few months it will be full of people in shorts.

As we drove out I saw a bird on the frozen pond

It was a bald eagle.

I wish I had my camera

The boys and I sat and looked at it.

They are majestic

A special treat to Iowa I suppose.

I am far from a nature person, but it was kinda cool.

It reminded me of my Grandma and her bird book

She does like nature...and birds:)

At least I have you Russell...

Quint as working on some major construction,

moving couch cushions

with Russell in tow (of course)

I over heard Quint say:

"This is some hard construction....

at least I have you Russell"

A few moments later....

Russell was distracted by a book

Quint was still working "hard"

He noticed Russell reading....

Quint said:

"Russell what are you doing....

we need help from you"

Quint kept on with his project.

Russell soon got back to "work"

I love, love, love, how different they are....

but I am so grateful for,

how well they go together:)

to all the pretenders

to all the women

who work so hard to paint the mirage...

to make the picture

look

perfect.

It took me a while...

but

I am on to you...

my veil has been lifted,

and I am sure it scares you.

because

I know your dirty little secret

what you have worked tirelessly to protect.

when the doors are closed,

and the van windows are up,

you occasionally lose it with you children,

your house is dirty,

you are not always infatuated with your husband.

you are not always perky...

you feed your children fast food (gasp)

Maybe it is just me,

but I have no desire to fake it.

If you want to be real,

share the down and dirty,

the great and the ugly of life,

I would love to be friends:)

But, if not....

know that I am on to you....

and it is not worth it.

Boats

Why are boats considered girls?

For example:

There she is.....

(referring to the boat)

or

Isn't she a beauty?

(boat again)

I like boats,

I think they are usually pretty

I guess they should be girls:)

Today I was just wondering why....

OLDER

Quint's sickness response reminded me of this exchange I had with a nurse last week.

I agree with him

it frustrates me when

"my body is not working"

I still do not feel "myself" since Rhett was born,

emotionally, physically, all around I just don't feel good.

I know it usually takes me close to a year to feel "myself" again,

but I was kinda hoping it would be faster this time.

Recently I called my Doctor,

the nurse told me

"it takes longer for your body to bounce back the more babies you have,

and the older you are"

OLDER.

Seriously.

Well, that did not make me feel better.

If you are a nurse,

please remember,

telling a woman she is not feeling well because she is

"older"

is not a good response...

Even if it is true:)

It is not working....

Quint has come down with a bad cold, possibly a sinus infection.

His voice is raspy, and his nose is goopy.

I wanted to see if it is green, so I asked him.....

"can I look at your nose?"

He came right over and said...

"it is not working"

(in his super cute congested voice)

It was adorable.

It occurred to me,

maybe he shares my frustration when things do not work on my body.

Seriously, if I have an ache I get crabby.

Russell and Rhett share the snottiness,

so

today will be a sick day.

Hang in PJ's

watch special shows....

and get healthy.

Such a bummer because Q will miss his Valentines Party at preschool.

Oh well:)

Somedays I just need....

a nap.

I love naps.
My mom always said you can either nap or you can't.
I can.
I love a good mid day snooze,
I wake up refreshed, feeling ready to take on the rest of the day.

Despite my need/love of naps
these days they have been very sparse.

Today BK took the boys out for a bit,
I cleaned for a while, but as soon as Rhett fell asleep,
I crawled in my bed
with the sun shining in through my shade I drifted to sleep.
Ahhh.
Total bliss.

When I woke,
I felt more refreshed than I had in a long time.
It was awesome.

Thanks to my awesome hubby.
(a non-napper)

Bummer for him.

22 Days

It has been 22 Days since BK has had a day off.

I am not complaining it is just a fact.

I actually was not counting, he told me today as he walked through the door.....

Early

He was home really Early.

It was AWESOME.

We needed some of him around here.

I was kinda amazed I didn't realize it was 22 days.

I guess I was just pushing, getting through, trying to be the best I could for BK, for the boys, for US.

I would be lying if I said I was not feeling run i little ragged.

I have had a few tough days,

but we made it.

We appreciate him working so hard for us,

but

I am so jazzed to have him home,

and the boys are ecstatic:)

And only 37 days till spring.

That # I am counting:)

Connected

Today I was driving and grabbed my cell phone to make a call.

For some reason, it took a moment to connect.

It made me think....

how do they work anyways.

It really is amazing.

little machines connecting us to people we love through outer space....

I don't get it,

but I am really glad someone else does:)

Today I really grateful for cell phones....

and a lot of minutes.

To change your day...

Do you ever feel God just sent a person to change your day?

BACKSTORY

I have been feeling a bit down

maybe it is winter

but i have struggled to see the joy in the routine

My Moment:

Today we desperately needed food.

The snow and cold have been deterring us

but today we had to go.

The plan was go to Aldi's

it is not our favorite shopping experience,

but it is super cheap

so we go.

The boys and I were trekking through Aldi's

and an older woman asked

"are they all yours?" (referring to the boys)

Yes, I responded, unsure what she might say next...

She paused, made eyes at Rhett and said

"you are triple blessed"

I paused and took it in,

Rhett in his car seat taking up nearly the whole cart,

Russell and Quint dragging our cloth Aldi's bags

(probably creating a hole)

and us taking up the entire aisle

(which is not good for Aldi's because you can't go around)

Immediately I realized,

I am focused on the chaos,

and I should be focused on my blessings.

We are triple blessed.

My attitude changed immediately, I was enjoying Aldi's

I could see the beauty in the chaos.

But it didn't last long...

A few minutes later we were checking out,

I was trying to pay, transfer carts (Aldis special requirement), and wrangle the older boys

when I noticed a cute older woman in a wheelchair watching me.

I didn't think much of it at first,

I basically feel like a sideshow whenever I am in public with all the boys

so staring is not rare.

I was feeling a little crazy as we began to pull away

she spoke up to the boys

"your mom is very together and organized"

I paused again

Immediately I thought:

"You obviously have not met me...

I am a hot mess"

but I decided to spare her the details and just said to her:

"I am just faking it"

She responded with continued encouragement

"well you fake it very well"

I paused again,

Was she crazy or did I actually look like I had it together?

we had made it through Aldis without a meltdown or breaking anything

I guess I had been very successful so far

again, I saw the joy in the chaos.

I thanked her, and

With a bit more spring in my step

I heaved my cart, loaded down with groceries, an baby seat, and two boys hanging off the sides.

As the automatic doors opened the cold attacked my face and hands

but I fought off my inclination to be angry at the weather

I said to the boys

"hang on we are going fast to the car like lightning McQueen"

After loading the car full of boys and groceries

and returning my cart to get my quarter

(another Aldi's special)

I could hardly feel my fingers...

but I felt warm inside.

My trip to Aldi's had changed my day

Not one, but two people sharing just a few words,

but words I needed to hear today

Some may say coincidence

I say providence.

Flurries

I am not a huge fan of winter, but I have to admit it is beautiful.

Today as my crew and I drove across town, some flurries were flying in the air.

For a moment, I soaked in the beauty of land covered in mounds of white snow, and pretty white flurries flying.

I know if we ever do move to a place where snow is not a part of our everyday lives in winter, I will miss this.

I don't think I will miss driving though the fat snowflakes which stick to the road and make it slippery, but I will miss the pretty flurries.

Just there to decorate the sky, but without ruining our freshly plowed roads:)

Staircase

I heard an awesome quote today.

I don't know if it is super famous I live under a rock, but I believe it is crazy true.

"Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase"

Martin Luther King Jr.

I have experienced this multiple times in my life....

and...

all I can say is it is amazing to take steps up an unknown staircase,

but it is even more amazing to look back down once you get to the top.

If I recommend any action in life....

it is to take a step....

What is the plan

I remember when I was younger my Aunt Doreen pointed out our family says "whats the plan" a lot.

I was probably 7 or 8 when she pointed it out...

and I remember thinking

"what is weird about wanting a plan?"

Maybe it was a bit weird,

but

growing up we usually had a plan.

I learned to love having a plan.

In college I learned the benefit to goal-orientated planning.

I have been hooked ever since...

Since embarking on our med journey it has required a lot of forward thinking, thoughtful planning.

BK has done an awesome job, getting the work done required for a successful plan.

I am so grateful.

BK is finishing 3rd year of med school and it is time to plan again....

Time to plan 4th year....

This requires picking a specialty, planning away rotations, planning vacation, interview and test time off.

I knew this was hanging out there, but I was trying not to push BK, because it may be our team but it is his career...

Last night we sat down and mapped it out.

Ahhhhh.

I was so pumped to have a plan.

Even thought it is a rough outline, it is a plan.

I will take it.

I know it lacks spontaneity,

but I love that BK loves to plan too:)

old clothes

Do you ever see an old picture and wonder what happened to the clothes you were wearing?

Or even worse...

Have you seen an old picture and realize you still wear those clothes despite the fact they are worn, a bit ratty, and definitely out of style?

Both happened to me today......

Asleep

The same day I wrote breaking.....

Russell was watching a video on the couch....

Quint was raging in his room.....

Rhett and I were laying on the floor.....

All the sudden my whole house was quiet.

It had been hours of craziness...

Quint was finally quiet...

Russell had passed out on the couch...

Rhett was still awake making baby eyes at me...

But, I knew he wasn't going anywhere...

I just laid there on the floor...

The carpet prickling on my face...

I was too lazy to get up and get a blanket...

I grabbed a coat on the floor nearby...

and covered Rhett and myself...

With one hand on him to sooth him...

I closed my eyes...

Asleep.

I don't know how long I was asleep...

I woke up to a still, quiet house...

Rhett peacefully sleeping next to me...

I felt replenished, strengthened.

I was reminded of this verse:

Matthew 11:28

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.

breaking point

The tantrums have been rough these days.
I feel like I am in a battle.
I know be firm, stand your ground, but it is emotionally breaking me.
I anticipated the teenage years to be emotional draining,
but I figured I would be wiser by then...
I never thought the psychological warfare would begin at age 4.

Am I doing it wrong?
Could this possibly be normal?

I know I am the boss, but the constant crying and carrying on is brutal.
I thought if you were firm they would learn it doesn't work.
I am not giving in...
but we are still here....
Quint is still raging...
I am on the verge of breaking...

My moment:
Quint raging...Russ sleeping...Rhett swinging but getting hungry....
I look around....
so much mess
so many needs
so much snow
so many battles
and all I want to do is crawl in my bed....and sleep.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 2nd Corinthians 12:9

Emergency Broadcast System works....

Everyone has heard on the radio or TV

Beep Beep

This is a test of the emergency broadcast system, in the case of an emergency......

Well we were out running errands before the "impending blizzard" and we heard on the radio

Beep Beep

But it was not a test!

They man came on and said

BLIZZARD WARNING!!

STAY HOME

DO NOT DRIVE

IF YOU DO DRIVE, AND IF YOU DO DRIVE AND GET STUCK, PREPARE TO STAY IN YOUR CAR ALL NIGHT

NO ONE WILL COME GET YOU

YOU MAY DIE

DEADLY WIND CHILLS

WHITE OUT CONDITIONS

STAY HOME!

I may have embellished a bit, but seriously it was intense. I think before living in the Midwest I had never heard anything but "this is a test". I heard it for the first time this summer about Tornadoes. We are living on the edge here:) Don't worry, it doesn't take much to keep us home in nasty weather. They boys and I are home awaiting the blizzard......